patgund: Knotwork (Safety)
patgund ([personal profile] patgund) wrote2007-08-09 05:22 pm

An open post

Someone, and I do not know who, has made a claim against me and Little Bit's mother, speading an outragous rumour.

Namely a claim that I was telling people that Little Bit's mother had ABANDONED Little Bit and that she was going to be adopted.

Now, ONE person in my LJ confused my LJ name for my daughter (Little Bit) with my name for the little boy we had for a couple in Poway (Littlest Bit) Said post is at http://patgund.livejournal.com/1834072.html I did correct that person (http://patgund.livejournal.com/1834072.html?thread=4340056#t4340056)

As a result of this, Little Bit's mother is refusing to talk to me.

If someone has spead such a story by mistake, putting 2+2 together and coming up with purple, then be known that your ill-thought words have only made worse a bad situation, and hurt two people who care for their daughter very much. And I ask that you try to repair the damage your words have caused.

If someone has spread such a story on purpose though, for whatever perverse reasons of their own, then I will call it what this is

An utter, complete, bullshit lie.

A lie that is not fair to her mother, myself, or our daughter.

You do NOT play games with a child like this. Not now, not ever.

I say this:

You are scum. Scum unworthy of courtesy, of dignity, of honor.

And as such, you are worthy of one thing

The gauntlet in the face and the words "I accept". Or coffee and pistols at dawn.

Your choice

On edit - her mother has also posted her statement on this matter at http://mysryael.livejournal.com/89991.html

Be aware that I will also happily take someone to court for libel and slander should I find out that this claim was made out of malice rather than ignorance. Neither her mother or myself need or deserve this kind of crap.

[identity profile] ismarc.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
I offer my services to stand as your second.

[identity profile] tepintzin.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 12:51 am (UTC)(link)
I'll bring the coffee!

[identity profile] patgund.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
What can I say, I'm a bit old fashioned in places

[identity profile] thats-ms-dragon.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 12:55 am (UTC)(link)
I sincerely hope that this is a situation where confusion and "telephone" are to blame. It is obvious that the two of you love this child endlessly. Perhaps it is a situation where there was a tiny bit of information spread among several people and 1+1+1+1 was just added up wrong.

This still sucks.

*hugs*

[identity profile] patgund.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
Hope so too.

[identity profile] mama-hogswatch.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 12:57 am (UTC)(link)
I didn't comment about it, but I will say I recall the post with "Littlest Bit" and read that as the nickname for your daughter and did wonder briefly about it.

[identity profile] patgund.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
*Nods* And at least two other people did misread that - one of which commented on it - and was corrected.

I did go back and place an "on edit" to make sure people knew the difference.

I've been calling him "Littlest Bit" since he was born, and figured by now most people knew. Mayhaps some newcomers didn't realize the name though - and made a simular mistake.

[identity profile] cahwyguy.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 01:20 am (UTC)(link)
For me, part of it was not understanding why Littlest Bits adoptive parents would be taking a picture of Little Bit. I just wrote it off to my not knowing the family dynamics, and looked instead at your cute daughter. I remember when my daughter was that cute. Of course, she's still cute, but she's also a teenager, all but in actual age :-).

[identity profile] omcintyre.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
This is a nasty situation to be in. I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with this. I have no idea what possesses some people to say things they have no business talking about.. especially when it's a blatent lie.

If there's anyone you need me to "accidentally" hit with my car (I'll blame the IH/PTC), just let me know.. we'll take care of it on the DL..

Best of luck, I'll be praying for you (all of you).

[identity profile] jazz007.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
I spend all year travelling around TX for fencing - if I need to look up the relevant hit-people in a TX city, let me or [livejournal.com profile] kd5mdk know!

[identity profile] cormac.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 03:54 am (UTC)(link)
She's refusing to talk to you not because one person in LJ confused names (though in point of fact, at least four people have told you so far that they were confused/concerned with the post in question, myself included, and I know of quite a few more). She isn't speaking to you because she sees the post itself as another way in which your posts have put her in a position where she has to defend actions she never perpetrated, and has been humiliated by friends and family who are demanding to know why they weren't allowed to help keep Mhari from adoption.

No, you aren't the person who is spreading the rumor that Mhari has been abandoned. But your post is clearly one of the early sources for the rumor, and your steadfast refusal to own up to that, your attempts to shift the blame entirely off of yourself and onto someone else, and the result of those actions continuing to place her in a negative light are the reason she has broken contact with you. That last reason, by the way, is the big one; come on Patrick, do you really think she's not talking to you because [livejournal.com profile] dragonessfaire posted a question, or because someone else is spreading a rumor? And yet, you've made it seem that way in your post, just as you made it seem (to those who didn't know the difference between Little Bit and Littlest Bit) that Mhari had been adopted.

And if you continue to cast her in a negative light, you'll have a gauntlet at your own feet to deal with. I'll not have my lady disrespected so, for anyone's pride, fear or misstatements.

[identity profile] patgund.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
Cormac, your willingness to defend your lady does you proud, and I find no fault with that.

Up until today, I knew of only one person who confused the two names, (you will note that per the request of Little Bit's mother, I will not real names, a convention I will hold up here). I did go back to my original post and clarify the two names in question, as per your suggestion. You and one other have since brought it to my attention, all of which are newer readers. Sounds like I should have made an FAQ.

I am rather confused here though. I have not disrespected her in any of these posts. Indeed, I have gone though them and can't find anything even smelling of disrespect. Please, if something I did write was taken the wrong way, please point it out to me.

I will point out that I'm in a simular boat, having to defend myself against actions I never perpetrated either. More than that, I'm also trying to defend Little Bit's mother against those who would defend me out of friendship.

An apology has been posted. Let me know what else can be done to fix this problem.

[identity profile] ashla-bogan.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 04:29 am (UTC)(link)
Gads..ppl are dumbasses

[identity profile] caprine.livejournal.com 2007-08-10 06:48 am (UTC)(link)
Holy flurking schnit.