Patrick McKinnion's Ramblings

(Also posted at Bad Fiction)


see more WTF Pictures and WTF videos by Picture Is Unrelated

(Knock knock.....)

"Yeah?"

"Hey, Patrick. It's your conscience."

"Oh hey, how's it going. Here, have a diet Barq's."

"That's nice. Now, about Bad Fiction...."

"What about it?"

"You know, it's supposed to be bad movies and worse politics. Seems like lately you've been all about the politics."

"Sigh. Yeah, I know. I need to do a review. I haven't done one since "The Violent Years"

"Now."

"Okay, I'll fire up the DVD player and start "The Touch of Satan" then. That should do it".

"No. You know which one."

"Space Mutiny?" "Evil Alien Conquerors"?

"No. You know which one. It's got Mark Hamil in it".

---

"Oh, "Laserhawk!" then....."

"No."

"I don't have 'Corvette Summer', but I suppose I can get a copy....."

"No."

"You mean??"

"Yes, THAT one!"

"Do I HAVE to?? I mean I reviewed "Zardoz", "Barn of the Blood Llama" and "A Polish Vampire in Burbank"!! I think I've paid my dues!"

"THAT ONE!"

"But that's the five scariest words to a Star Wars fan!! That is, of course, next to "Jabba The Hutt's Prostate Exam" and "Jar-Jar Binks Fetish Porn".

"You know what needs to be done......"

"WHINE........."

( Review behind cut )

When I was down in San Diego on Friday, I found these examples of the Post Office's new R2-D2 mailboxes.

( Postal Astromech behind cut )

....but is it $499 worth of cool???

Lego Set #10179 - Ultimate Collector's Millennium Falcon

This is it - the biggest, most spectacular LEGO® Star Wars model ever! Straight out of the classic Star Wars movies comes the Ultimate Collector's Millennium Falcon, Han Solo's famous smuggling starship. Every detail of the modified Corellian Engineering Corporation YT-1300 freighter is here, all constructed to scale with LEGO minifigures. At almost 3 feet (90cm) long, it's the ultimate centerpiece to any Star Wars collection!

5195 pieces, will ship Oct 1st, 2007. 33" long, 22" wide and 8" tall! (84cm long x 56cm wide x 21cm tall)

Wow

(crossposted to starwars and my LJ)

If this guy is serious, well, I think I'm embarassed to be a Star Wars fan.....

‘Da Vinci Code’ steals from ‘Star Wars’

"Upon seeing “The Da Vinci Code” this weekend, I can finally empathize with all the protesters I saw in front of the theater. My objection to the movie isn’t rooted in religious beliefs or even moral disagreements, but rather the disrespectful mockery of the world’s oldest and most famous story. “Star Wars” is both a literary and cinematic treasure, and Dan Brown’s recent atrocity is nothing more than blatant plagiarism of Lucas’ timeless creation.

The likeness goes far past incidental similarities and can be more aptly described as a rip-off. For starters, look at the characters. “The Da Vinci Code” features a faceless antagonist referred to as “teacher,” much like the part of the emperor in “Star Wars.” This “teacher” controls the actions of the Bishop Aringarosa (Darth Vader) as well as Silas (Darth Maul); both of which are sith-like pawns in his ultimate plan to find the Holy Grail.

The Knights Templar are unmistakably the knighted force of the Jedi, fighting alongside the Priory of Sion, or rebellion as the case may be. While the movie omitted the return of Sophie’s brother, the book features it as the two being raised separately after their parent’s death to ensure their safety. It’s almost too easy for me to draw this painfully obvious line from that to the Luke and Leia situation. Hanks’ character, Langdon, was only missing the Wookie Chewbacca by his side.

I only wish the comparisons ended there, but they spread far past similar characters. The church’s order to terminate the Knights Templar is the emperor’s “order 66” for the clone armies to eliminate all Jedi. A few survived to protect, raise and teach the last scion, just as Obi-Won and Master Yoda did. Not to mention my favorite scene where Langdon rescues Sophie from the Death Star. Either way, I can hardly wait for the sequels. I’m sure “Da Vinci Strikes Back,” and “Return of the Code” are going to be huge hits.

Any movie worth seeing must in some way take from “Star Wars,” and fiction is fiction no matter what the subject matter.

May The Force be with you.

SCOTT HARTMAN 
Fort Wayne"