Huh??

[patgund]

Job info sent to me:

"minimum of five years progressive experience leading largecomplex technology projects impacting systems and business processeds n multiple departments utilizing projekt management an systems development methodologies involving the relevant technology an the use of projekt scheduling tools developing projektcommunication plans scope budgetingfinancialing schedules identifying allocatinging an managing internal resources external contractors an vendorsvendor contracts while incorporating goodcommunication negotiation visionating an leadership skills."

Whaaaaaa?

Comments

[heisenfeature.livejournal.com]

Whoa. You could fill an entire buzzword bingo card there :)

[patgund.livejournal.com]

Even if you were playing blackout on the card :-)

[matrygg.livejournal.com]

from the use of projekt, I'd wager it's a bad translation of german, maybe?

[patgund.livejournal.com]

Maybe a German pointy-haired boss who hasn't used up his buzzword allowance?

OKAY then......

[mysryael.livejournal.com]

I have to wonder if the person who wrote this
was a technical writer for Simplicity Patterns.

It has that kind of feel to it.

What do you suppose the contract would look like?

Re: OKAY then......

[mysryael.livejournal.com]

My apologies Patrick but I couldn't stand this.

So I rewrote it to what I THINK they said?
anybody else wanna take a shot at this?

C


∑ Minimum of five years progressive experience leading large complex technology projects impacting systems.

∑ Business processes in multiple departments utilizing project management and systems development methodologies involving the relevant technology.

∑ Project scheduling tools

∑ Developing project communication plans

∑ Scope budgeting

∑ Financial scheduling

∑ Identifying, allocating, and managing both internal resources and external contractors

∑ Identifying, allocating, and managing vendors and vendor contracts while incorporating good communications in negotiation using leadership skills and creative vision.

[jeran.livejournal.com]

I get similar e-mails all the time from apparently legitimate recruiting companies. Mangled syntax, painful spelling, inconsistent capitalization. Makes me wonder about the skill level of the people they're hiring. I figure if that's the best they can do at making an impression on me, I do not want them making an impression on a potential employer on my behalf.

[caprine.livejournal.com]

Never eat at a place called Mom's.

Never play poker with a man called Doc.

Never sleep with somebody who's crazier than you are.

Never work for a company that uses the word "visionating".

[mysryael.livejournal.com]

AMEN SYSTER!

[ismarc.livejournal.com]

multiple departments utilizing projekt management

Does this company specialize in "darkwave" and industrial dance music?

[patgund.livejournal.com]

(chuckle) I was thinking that too

[snobahr.livejournal.com]

I'm the operator of my network co-locator!

Beep-boop... BZZZT!

[loli-cat.livejournal.com]

Sounds like they have a good administrative doublespeak department...

[patgund.livejournal.com]

Which they paid for by laying off the technical writers and QA personnel......