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patgundFrom the SCA-Humour list......
A Modest Proposal
Gentle Cousins, The Imperial Marshal has spoken, and we must obey. But I fear he has not gone far enough; having Archers and other so-called "Light" fighters wear full Heavy Armor and be liable for blows is all well and good, but does not take in the truly vulnerable portion of the SCA, the non-fighters. If an armed fighter is truly to be free to exercise his/her God-given rights to hit anything that moves, He/She must be able to clean-clock the populace at will. How many members of the viewing public have been hurt by a flying sword with a broken lanyard? Pity the poor fighter whose view of the Warfield is obscured by his/her spiffy new helm that unfortunately gives them the viewing radius of a gerbil wrapped in duct tape. What is a fighter to do when he/she is the last warrior standing? The solution? Full Body Armor for all Non-Fighters! Just think: o - No more non-fighters calling "hold" at inopportune times, o - The need for marshals "to protect the populace" would go away, o - Royal Court becomes a "Target Rich Environment!" Just think, Armor makers will make a fortune designing armor for Listministers, Heralds, Chirurgeons, and all others who need to go to events. Gold Key will take on new power, as we outfit casual bystanders at demos. Even A&S people will not be exempt; think of the lovely Armor the Needleworkers and Lacemakers will produce. And for those who for some reason can't wear armor, Pavilions will need to be armored, along with other refuges from the new, empowered warrior class. Doubtless, A new industry of Portable Redoubts will emerge! Finally, an SCA that puts fighters and their fighting first! Just like the Archers, all others will just have to learn their place. With as much respect as this subject deserves, I am Your Humble Servant, Roger of Belden Abbey
A Modest Proposal
Gentle Cousins, The Imperial Marshal has spoken, and we must obey. But I fear he has not gone far enough; having Archers and other so-called "Light" fighters wear full Heavy Armor and be liable for blows is all well and good, but does not take in the truly vulnerable portion of the SCA, the non-fighters. If an armed fighter is truly to be free to exercise his/her God-given rights to hit anything that moves, He/She must be able to clean-clock the populace at will. How many members of the viewing public have been hurt by a flying sword with a broken lanyard? Pity the poor fighter whose view of the Warfield is obscured by his/her spiffy new helm that unfortunately gives them the viewing radius of a gerbil wrapped in duct tape. What is a fighter to do when he/she is the last warrior standing? The solution? Full Body Armor for all Non-Fighters! Just think: o - No more non-fighters calling "hold" at inopportune times, o - The need for marshals "to protect the populace" would go away, o - Royal Court becomes a "Target Rich Environment!" Just think, Armor makers will make a fortune designing armor for Listministers, Heralds, Chirurgeons, and all others who need to go to events. Gold Key will take on new power, as we outfit casual bystanders at demos. Even A&S people will not be exempt; think of the lovely Armor the Needleworkers and Lacemakers will produce. And for those who for some reason can't wear armor, Pavilions will need to be armored, along with other refuges from the new, empowered warrior class. Doubtless, A new industry of Portable Redoubts will emerge! Finally, an SCA that puts fighters and their fighting first! Just like the Archers, all others will just have to learn their place. With as much respect as this subject deserves, I am Your Humble Servant, Roger of Belden Abbey
