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patgundThe stories in this blog are sickening. More so because they're real. They're from two women who have escaped from the "Quiverful" movement.
No Longer Quivering
Example:
"I was feeling pretty desperate about how far behind the kids were getting in their education ~ and I could see that their emotional and social maturity was being stunted as well. So ~ after a series of grueling, hours-long, headache-invoking conversations ~ I talked Warren into allowing the children to participate in 4-H.
Sure enough ~ it didn't work out. The kids didn't like going to the meetings (because they felt like freaks) ~ PLUS, seeing the competence of the other kids made our kids more aware of what they were missing out on by not going to school. Weren't homeschoolers supposed to be way ahead of public schoolers? Mine weren't ~ and they knew it ~ which led them to complain and ask questions ~ which put Warren on the defensive and he became uptight, whiney, angry ... We had endless "discussions" in which he complained about the negative effects of the "worldly influences" which the kids were being subjected to in 4-H ~ and I provided counter-examples in a effort to allay his insecurities and convince him to let the kids continue in the club. This became almost a DAILY ordeal ~ eating up hours of my time and zapping any energy which I might have had to help the kids with their projects.
So ~ despite the fact that the kids were learning some fun and useful skills in 4-H, I finally pulled them out in order to restore some semblance of peace in our home. We quit. It was just easier than fighting the Holy Spirit ~ Who was obviously backing up my husband's authority as head of our home. I learned from repeated experience that it just did me no good to try and buck "the system" ~ i.e., the patriarchal system in which the father's ability or competence to lead the family do not really enter into the equation ~ HE is the Head. Period. Don't fight it ~ or you're fighting God and that is always a wasted effort."
Or from one of the daughters that escaped with their mother:
"When I was eleven or so, my parents decided to get rid of the girls' pants. Inside, I protested vehemently to this choice. I loved active sports, gymnastics, climbing trees... and I saw dresses as serious disabling devices as far as my interests were concerned. However, my dad pointed out that I needed to become a meek, chaste lady, so I obeyed and gave away my shorts, trousers, and capris.
Chaste - that was a word that always made me helplessly angry. My dad always referenced the word to a woman who walks with her head humbly bowed in a gesture of meekness and humility toward her father and husband. I often wondered what my father had done to deserve this kind of honor. However, since my job was to be absolutely obedient to my father and give him all respect, I never argued, just asked God through angry tears why I had to be a girl."
*sigh* How can people DO this to their partners, their spouses, their own children??? They claim that this lifestyle "raises" women to their rightful place, which "liberates" them. That's like "raising" a doormat. You can claim how liberating and awesome a doormat's role is, but at the end of the day, people are still wiping their feet on you.
No Longer Quivering
Example:
"I was feeling pretty desperate about how far behind the kids were getting in their education ~ and I could see that their emotional and social maturity was being stunted as well. So ~ after a series of grueling, hours-long, headache-invoking conversations ~ I talked Warren into allowing the children to participate in 4-H.
Sure enough ~ it didn't work out. The kids didn't like going to the meetings (because they felt like freaks) ~ PLUS, seeing the competence of the other kids made our kids more aware of what they were missing out on by not going to school. Weren't homeschoolers supposed to be way ahead of public schoolers? Mine weren't ~ and they knew it ~ which led them to complain and ask questions ~ which put Warren on the defensive and he became uptight, whiney, angry ... We had endless "discussions" in which he complained about the negative effects of the "worldly influences" which the kids were being subjected to in 4-H ~ and I provided counter-examples in a effort to allay his insecurities and convince him to let the kids continue in the club. This became almost a DAILY ordeal ~ eating up hours of my time and zapping any energy which I might have had to help the kids with their projects.
So ~ despite the fact that the kids were learning some fun and useful skills in 4-H, I finally pulled them out in order to restore some semblance of peace in our home. We quit. It was just easier than fighting the Holy Spirit ~ Who was obviously backing up my husband's authority as head of our home. I learned from repeated experience that it just did me no good to try and buck "the system" ~ i.e., the patriarchal system in which the father's ability or competence to lead the family do not really enter into the equation ~ HE is the Head. Period. Don't fight it ~ or you're fighting God and that is always a wasted effort."
Or from one of the daughters that escaped with their mother:
"When I was eleven or so, my parents decided to get rid of the girls' pants. Inside, I protested vehemently to this choice. I loved active sports, gymnastics, climbing trees... and I saw dresses as serious disabling devices as far as my interests were concerned. However, my dad pointed out that I needed to become a meek, chaste lady, so I obeyed and gave away my shorts, trousers, and capris.
Chaste - that was a word that always made me helplessly angry. My dad always referenced the word to a woman who walks with her head humbly bowed in a gesture of meekness and humility toward her father and husband. I often wondered what my father had done to deserve this kind of honor. However, since my job was to be absolutely obedient to my father and give him all respect, I never argued, just asked God through angry tears why I had to be a girl."
*sigh* How can people DO this to their partners, their spouses, their own children??? They claim that this lifestyle "raises" women to their rightful place, which "liberates" them. That's like "raising" a doormat. You can claim how liberating and awesome a doormat's role is, but at the end of the day, people are still wiping their feet on you.
